"Very cute first draft. An overall note is how the character of Elinor is sounding. She doesn't *quite* seem like the normal Elinor we know? She sounds a little bit younger? And it feels she's missing that sense of curiosity? Have a think and do a pass with her character in mind. Some specific notes below. Thanks!" 1. INT. ELINOR’S ROOM -- DAY ELINOR is in her room, getting ready for school, humming to herself as she gathers her things for her backpack. "Line Count - 117 Ari - 17 Elinor - 60 Olive - 17 Mr. Rabbit - 17 Ranger Rabbit - 6 (anyway we can ge this down to 4 lines?)" DESIGN NOTE: Her room is decorated with home-made fish that she’s drawn, or cut out of construction paper, or made from paper plates, or whatever. Maybe she’s even made a “fish mobile” to hang over her bed. cute opening Elinor (sing-song) Fish, fish, fishy, fishy, fish, fish, fish… She takes one fish drawing off the wall, grabs her backpack and runs out of the room. 2. INT. Kitchen -- DAy Elinor is at the table, eating her breakfast and gazing at her fish picture as MR. RABBIT makes flapjacks (pancakes). fun Elinor Hey Dad! Did you know fish eat their breakfast underwater? Maybe "pancakes" will be more recognizable to U.S. kids? Mr. Rabbit Really? That would make for some soggy carrot flapjacks. ELINOR (giggling) Daddy, fish don’t eat flapjacks they eat underwater plants and things. MR. RABBIT Riiight. ELINOR Fish do EVERYTHING underwater - eat, swim, play - even sleep. MR. RABBIT Do tell. ELINOR Uh-huh, they are sooo interesting. RANGER RABBIT enters. RANGER rABBIT Ohh, carrot flapjacks! Nice family humor Mr. RABBIT (formally, like a waiter) Your breakfast is served madame. He puts a stack in front of Ranger Rabbit but just as she’s about to dig in she notices her watch (or a clock on the wall). Ranger Rabbit Uh-oh. It’s later than I thought - we’d better hurry up Elinor, or you’ll be late for school. MR. RABBIT I’ll make those flapjacks to go. ElINOR just like all my friends at my school <GASP!> Mom! Did you know that a group of fish is called a school. Just like my school. I can’t wait to tell Mz. Mole. She hops off. Mr. Rabbit hands Ranger Rabbit a paper bag and gives her a kiss on the cheek. Wonder what Sara thinks of using the word "kick" in this episode. Can you consult? MR. RABBIT I think Elinor is on a bit of a fish-kick. does elinor overhear? If so, she could say '(giggle)dad, fish cant kick, then dont have legs!' - which is also foreshadowing whats to come RANGER RABBIT like Kevins suggestion You don’t say. 3. EXT. PAth on the way to SCHOOL – DAY Elinor is hopping along ahead of her Mom. ElINOR (sing-song) Fish, fish, fishy, fishy, fish, fish, fish… They comes to a small crossroad in the path - the other path is obviously a little less used (this is not far from her house, we see the house in view). RaNGER RABBIT We don’t have much time. You’d better take the shortcut to school today, Elinor. ELINOR Okay. Ranger Rabbit gives her a kiss. RANGER RABBIT See you tonight, hunny bunny. Have a great day. school in view' we dont have a location that wide with w pond and the school way in the distance. I suggest we dont see the school at this time ELINOR Bye, Mom! Elinor waves to Ranger Rabbit who watches as she hops off onto a smaller path (maybe with the school in view?). 4. EXT. SHORTCUT PATH - day She hopping along. Something mangled in: "She hopping along" is she reacting to the fish? she yells it out yet it reads like the plash happens afterwards and she then says 'whu?' - suggest she doesn treact this excited yet. ELINOR Fish, fish, FISH!!! Suddenly <SFX: SPLASH> from the pool. Elinor is puzzled. Is this a stream? - if its possible, we have a great stream location that would be nice for her to come by on her way to school ElINOR (CONT’D) Whu? She looks closely at the little pool of water. ELINOR (CONT’D) <GASP!> A fish! A REAL fish! ANGLE ON: Spotty is a bullfrog tadpole, nice and fat - and spotty! ELINOR (CONT’D) Wow! Look at the way you swim, and your nice long tail, and your spots. Would you like to be my fishy friend? ANGLE ON: The tadpole looks at Elinor in a friendly way (they do look friendly!) ELINOR (CONT’D) You would? Awesome, I’m going to name you... (she thinks) SPOTTY! At this moment she hears <SFX: SCHOOL BELL RINGING> in the distance. ELINOR (CONT’D) <GASP!> Gotta get to school. (she hops off) See you later, Spotty! 5. EXT. SCHOOL YARD – DAY Elinor bounces into the schoolyard, very excited. "Lines 27-30: feels a bit forced? Try something like Olive Ari, guess what? Mmm, let me guess… is it about fish? You HAVE been on kind of a fish kick lately, Elinor (Giggle) I HAVE been learning a lot about fish lately. But guess what? I saw a real fish today! etc." since the bell rang, the kids should be heading into school - this ca take place as she catches up to them and the enter. or perhaps elinor bounds in and meets them at the blue cubbys inside the school ELINOR Olive! Ari! Guess what? I just saw a fish! the dialogue between 28 - 30 - its a bit odd that Ari would respond thinking she is talking about one of her drawings. maybe instead "A fish? did it look like one of your drawings?' Ari <- agree A fish? You mean like the ones you’ve been drawing? is this something a kids would say? Olive (giggling) not really kid-like language... Yeah, you’ve kind of been on a fish kick lately, Elinor. "if changing 28 - perhaps elinor would respond ""But this one was different, I named her Spotty! Come on, I’ll draw a picture to show you. " ELINOR Or -I want to draw a picture of SPotty so I can show you No, a REAL fish! One that lives underwater. I named her Spotty! Come on, I’ll draw a picture to show you. They all run into the school. 6. EXT. CLASSROOM – DAY Elinor is busily drawing as Ari and Olive look on. ElINOR I was taking the shortcut to school, and there was this tiny pool of water, and I heard a SPLASH, and then I looked down and... Olive/ari Whoooa! ANGLE ON: Elinor’s drawing of Spotty. Ari (O.C.) Now that is a cool fish. Elinor (O.C.) She really is! WIDEN TO REVEAL: OLIVE and ARI are admiring the drawing. Cute she says 'such' 3 times, can we rework so she expresses herself differently Elinor (CONT’D) could remove suches all together She has such a neat shape and such a nice colour . And she swims in such an interesting way - she kind of wiggles, like this. Elinor wiggles, Olive and Ari <SFX: GIGGLES> OLIVE I love her eyes, she looks so friendly. ARI I like her spots. Spots are soo cool. I wish I had spots. OlIVE (helpfully) it is a little odd to compare spots to wings...more likely to compare fins to wings because they both support motion...not a big deal though Well, you have wings, Ari. And wings are very cool too. after 39 - flutter flip - I would assume they are all seated in chairs - would be a bit awkward for him to get up to do this action and then comment - we can still have him open and close his arms as he's seated ARI Oh, yeah, He does a little flutter flip. Fun Ari (CONT’D) Hey. You know what would be the coolest - SPOTTED WINGS! ELINOR That would be cool. Meanwhile Olive is admiring Elinor’s drawing. OlIVE I’d sure like to meet Spotty one day. ArI Me too. sounds a bit old ELINOR I’ll introduce you, next time we’re in her part of the forest. 7. EXT. SHORTCUT PATH – A FEW DAYS LATER Elinor is hopping through the forest. change if we are using the stream location - maybe instead it's "i'm coming Spotty' as she gets closer. Otherwise it almost reads like she forgot she will come across where spotty lives ElINOR Oh! There’s Spotty’s pond. She hops over and looks down. ElinOR (CONT’D) Spotty? Oh, Spooootty... A little <SPLASH>. ElINOR (CONT’D) <GASP!> There you are! Hi Spotty! She bends down to look. ELINOR (CONT’D) Sorry I haven’t visited in a few days. I walked to school the long way with my Mom. How are you doing? Another <SFX: SPLASH> ELINOR (CONT’D) (giggles) Oh, very splashy I see. (she notices) Wait a second. What are those? ANGLE ON: Spotty - we can see she has two little bumps on her sides. Maybe she brings out a magnifying glass to make this observation? ELINOR (CONT’D) Spotty you have two bumps on you. What ARE they? Spotty <SFX: SPLASHES> again. sounds a bit old ELINOR (CONT’D) not sure this line is needed... Well, whatever they are, they don’t seem to slow you down. At that moment we hear the <SFX: SCHOOL BELL>. montage after line 52 - her desk is on the other side of the window - would be cute to have her lying on her bed to draw(which is close to the window) ELINOR (CONT’D) Ooops, gotta go to school. I’ll check on you later, okay, Spotty? 8. TIME-PASSING MONTAGE Elinor shows more pictures of Spotty to Olive and Ari in the schoolyard. Elinor is telling her parents about Spotty over dinner with a drawing. Elinor is looking out the window. It’s raining. She turns back to her craft table and starts drawing more pictures of Spotty. Elinor in her room, putting up a picture of Spotty overtop of her fish pictures. Elinor has made a “Fish mask” - a green balaclava with spots. She puts it on and compares herself to her picture of Spotty - twins! END MONTAGE 9. EXT. SHORTCUT to school - day Elinor is wearing her balaclava as she hops along on her way to school again (she will wear it for the rest of the Episode). Maybe instead of talking to herself, a more natural way is to have her walking with mom and she tells mom she's gonna take the short cut, and she can't wait to show spotty her new mask, etc. Have mom say something cute like, have a good day my fishie bunny, or something. reads elinor wears the mask for the rest of the ep - can we not have her remove it by seq 11 once she takes her friends to see spotty? or especially later the next day - why would she still have it on? ELINOR I can’t wait to show Spotty my fish mask. We look just the same! She gets to the little pond, there’s a <SFX: SPLASH>. ElINOR (CONT’D) Hey Spotty! Sorry I didn’t visit for a while. Look what I made! She models her mask. ELINOR (CONT’D) I’m a fish too, just like... (then she notices) Spotty? ANGLE ON: Spotty in the water now has legs! "I know it's fine line to thread, but I feel like starting here we should somehow see a bit more of that Elinor curiosity that we're used to. I'm not sure how that would manifest or blend with the plot, but have a think on it. Maybe there would be a little more internal confusion, or wanting to reconcile the incongruence in the situation? Maybe a more natural way to get her out of the scene is the school bell? Move the school bell from earlier to here?" ELINOR (CONT’D) OH MY GOODNESS! Spotty! You have LEGS!!! How can that be? (she considers) I HAVE to tell Olive and Ari about this. She hops off. 10. EXT. ScHoolyard - day Olive and Ari are gobsmacked about the news. 57-60: this dialogue is a bit zig-zagged: it starts out about legs, then mask then back to legs. Maybe she arrives looking confused, and then her friends comment on the mask, then they ask her why she looks confused, and Elinor explains? We need more observations! OlIVE Legs? Really? ElINOR Yes! They started out as little bumps but now Spotty has LEGS! Reads a bit odd - she say thank you to him saying that spotty legs is cooler than her mask - maybe instead he says something about it being cool.just as cool as her mask ARI Awesome! That’s even cooler than your fish mask Elinor. ELINOR Thanks, Ari. I made it so Spotty and I could be the same. OlIVE (giggling) And now you’re even more the same, ‘cause you both have legs. Around here it would be good to raise their doubts: "I've never seen a fish with legs" / "I didn't fish could have legs" ArI A fish with legs. I gotta see that. OLIVE Me too. ELINOR Okay! I’ll take you to meet Spotty, right after school. You’re gonna be amazed! 11. EXT. PUDDLE ON THE PATH - DAY The kids are running through the forest. ElINOR Spotty’s pond is just over here. They arrive, Elinor points. <SFX: SPLASH> ELINOR (CONT’D) There she is. ANGLE ON: Spotty, with legs. This is what they are thinking, but it's wrong information, so let's be careful about saying it so directly and potentially confusing the kids at home. Just have her confirm that she sees the legs? OLIVE Wow, you’re right Elinor. Spotty IS a fish with legs. ArI How can that even be? OLIVE Dun, dun dunnn, it’s a mystery. A FISHY mystery. ELINOR We need MORE observations. Elinor and Olive start observing (with the magnifying glass). "I think you can extend this exchange a little more. Something like, Hmm, spotty has legs all right. But… she doesn't quite look like other fish. What do you mean? Well… (and then she makes a few observations, like she has eyes and a mouth… but fish usually have fins) or something like that." OLIVE Hmmm. Spotty has legs all right, but you know what she doesn’t have? Fins! Like other fish do. ANGLE ON: Spotty, legs, no fins. does this have to be a separate pond? can it not be further down the stream? ELINOR spotty did have fins before right? are you talking about the tail fin or a different fin? You’re right, Olive. I never noticed that before. Meanwhile Ari has discovered a little bigger pond nearby (very safe and puddle-like). ArI Olive, Elinor - come and look at this! They run over. ArI (CONT’D) I found a whole bunch of Spotties. ANGLE ON: The pond with tadpoles at various stages. <SFX: KIDS WOOOOW WALLA> ElINOR There sure ARE a lot of Spotties. But...they don’t all look the same. ANGLE ON: Olive takes out her notebook. OlIVE I’d better take some notes. BACK ON: The tadpoles. ELINOR 77-79 maybe they notice the smallest ones have tailfins and no legs and the bigger ones have no tail fin and legs- this way they can discover how it changes as it grows That one looks like Spotty used to - no legs at all. ANGLE ON: Olive draws a picture of a tadpole with no legs. BACK ON: The tadpoles. Ari And that one looks like Spotty does now - with legs. ANGLE ON: Olive draws another picture. ElINOR This one has front legs too! Olive draws a tadpole with front legs, Elinor looks more closely. ANGLE ON: A tadpole with front legs, back legs and a tail, in other words a “froglet”. Here they are looking at the paper drawings right? It would probably work better on screen to show the progression on the paper. ElinOR (CONT’D) Wait a minute - this fish with front legs and back legs doesn’t really look like a fish to me at all. Lines 81-87: These lines feel like there's something missing. Maybe a sense of astoundment from the kids? They're discovering all these strange creatures that look similar but have all these odd similarities and things that don't quite make sense to a kid's mind. Have a think and maybe do a pass to make it more natural? Olive What does it look like? Elinor Kind of like.... Meanwhile Ari is distracted. is ari just pointing out a frog? or is he also coming up with a comparison. suggest 'A frog! - over ther.look!' so its almost like he's finishing her sentence Ari Hey, look over there! A frog! ANGLE ON: A frog hopping nearby. ElINOR That’s it! A frog! The fish with arms and legs looks like...a frog! COMPARE: The two animals, or the frog with Olive’s drawing. OlIVE You’re right Elinor. It does look like a frog, but with a tail. ELINOR If Spotty grows arms too, then that’s what she’ll look like. I think we jumped too fast to this conclusion. They should see all these strange creatures, then look at the differences and patterns, then posit that maybe they are all the same animal (it's just that they change as they grow), then make the connection: wait, does that mean that Spotty is NOT a fish? Not sure, but something like that. Ari So does that mean Spotty’s not a fish after all? ELINOR Maybe not. At this moment Mr. Rabbit joins them (Elinor’s house is not far). mr.rabbit entrance seems very convenient. can there be another reason for him passing by. he's returning from picking up vegetables from farmer bears farm? or he picked up more paper from mr.hippos store - elinor has been drawing so much lately that theyve run out. Mr. RaBBIT Love that he says "looking really closely" can we follow that up with "how scientists make careful observations" Hey, kids. I saw you looking at something really closely. What are you up to? ELINOR It’s Spotty, Daddy! MR. RABBIT What about Spotty? ELINOR She has...LEGS! Mr. RABBIT Legs? But I thought Spotty was a fish? Recap the reasons here. ELINOR I thought so too, but now we’re thinking she might be...a frog. MR. RABBIT A frog? Let me see. ANGLE ON: Spotty. The lesson came a line or two too fast. Have him go, Ah, I see. Well, you're right, Spotty is NOT a fish, she's a frog. But how can that be? Then he explains. Something like that. Mr. RABBIT (CONT’D) I think you’re right kids. I think Spotty is on her way to becoming a frog. ElINOR On her way? What do you mean on her way, Daddy. MR. RABBIT Well, you see frogs start out as eggs. ANGLE ON: Maybe he points to some frog eggs. Ari Really? I thought only birds lay eggs. MR. RABBIT Frogs do too, and so do some other animals, like turtles and lizards. Then, when the frog eggs hatch, they look like little fish but they’re called tadpoles. He points to a tadpole in the pond. OlIVE Tadpoles! I LIKE that word! MR. RABBIT Then the tadpoles grow legs and arms too, and are called froglets. OLIVE I like that word too - Froglets! ELINOR I think I understand what’s happening. I feel we are missing that moment, or build up, around these lines that shows Elinor getting fascinated and falling in love with frogs and how cool they are. MR. RABBIT Then the froglets lose their tails, which doesn’t hurt them at all, and become frogs. They are all amazed at this, <SFX: WOOOW WALLA> I think let's have her recap the lesson for the episode right before the song. The lesson is not that Spotty is not a fish, but that frogs start out looking like little fish, then they grow and become frogs. Or something like that. ELINOR (sure now) That means… Spotty is NOT a fish. She’s a tadpole, turning into a FROG! MR. RABBIT You got it, Elinor! SONG MONTAGE As we sing the song Elinor follows Spotty on her journey as she turns into a frog. Elinor/Ari/ Olive ELINOR: Every little frog Starts with an egg And when it hatches It has no legs ARI: A tadpole’s not much more Than a tail and a head OLIVE: But it will grow and change And become a frog instead. ALL Grow and change Grow and change Baby frogs Grow and change. ELINOR: A tadpole swims around Happy in their pond But soon they grow back legs That they can jump on. OLIVE: When the front legs come A froglet becomes a frog ARI: And climbs out of the water To sit happy on a log. ALL: Grow and change Grow and change Baby frogs, Grow and change Grow and change Grow and change ELINOR: My friend Spotty Will grow and change. 12. INT. ELINOR’S ROOM -- DAY CU: Elinor is now putting up the pictures she drew of Spotty (or Olive’s drawings) in each different stage. This line feels a bit odd for her. They are technically all frogs, that's the lesson of the episode. Maybe she just explains the different drawings to her mom. This is the frog egg, then a tadpole comes out… etc. ElINOR (sing-song) Frog, frog, froggy, froggy, frog, frog, frog. WIDEN TO REVEAL: Her parents are watching. ElINOR (CONT’D) Ooops, I mean... (she indicates) Egg, Tadpole, tadpole with legs, froglet and frog. And they are ALL Spotty! RaNGER RABBIT Very nice, Elinor. Mr. RABBIT They ALL look just like Spotty to me! And so do you, by the way. Instead of "wanted" try "thought I had" did she make a new mask? ELINOR mask?-maybe she is going to make a frog mask? Thanks. I wanted a fish friend but it turns out Spotty wasn’t a fish after all. She’s a FROG. But that’s okay because frogs are SO cool, and now I have a frog mask AND a frog friend. FADE OUT: as she starts riffing about frogs. Cute. Feel like you could button the episode by having Mom and Dad repeat lines 14 and 15 but with frogs. Perhaps she starts to exit her room - her mom and dad turn to walk with her as they leave and we hear the rest of her line as it starts to fade - we end on her wall of drawings ElINOR (CONT’D) (fade out) cute Did you know frogs can live on land AND in the water, and that they really do sit on lilypads, and they really love to hop, and they have long sticky tongues and.... THE END

EWW173 Elinor’s Fishy Friend -- FIRST DRAFT -- .

Ooops froggy froglet

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ELINOR WONDERS WHY EWW 173: ELINOR'S FISHY FRIEND Written by Katherine Sandford Elinor’s Question: What happened to Elinor’s fish friend Spotty? Logline: Elinor makes friends with a fish she names Spotty, but then something amazing happens, Spotty grows LEGS. LS4 . Understand that all animals and plants have a life cycle, can reproduce, and change and grow over time: a. Observe the life cycle of familiar plants and animals b. Observe the growth in animals and plants c. Understand that living things grow and change over time (Elinor and her friends observe the different stages in the life cycle of a frog). LS7 . Understand that young animals and young plants are very much, but not exactly like their parents: a. Understand that the young of a species are the same kind of animal or plant as the parents b. Arrange and compare illustrations of humans and other animals in developmental sequence from infancy to adult (Elinor and her friends arrange drawings of Spotty into a developmental sequence as it matures from tadpole to froglet to frog). SEP1 . Asking questions (science) and defining problems (engineering) a. Demonstrate curiosity about the greater world outside of their local environment b. Ask more complex questions about observable phenomena c. Ask and/or identify cause and effect questions that can be answered by an investigation (Elinor and her friends ask questions about Spotty's changes, and decide to investigate) SEP2 . Developing and using models a. Represent observable, concrete objects, events, and findings in many different ways c. Use simple models to support explanations (Elinor and her friends make pictures of the various stages of the frog's development). SEP3 . Planning and carrying out investigations b. Compare and contrast objects and events by describing similarities and differences in detail (Elinor and her friends compare the different stages of the frog's development) SEP4 . Analyzing and interpreting data a. Collect, describe, and record observations in greater detail and in various ways (Elinor and her friends collect data on the various stages of a frog's life). SEP7 . Engaging in argument from evidence a. Engage in discussions before, during, and after investigations. b. Support thinking and argue ideas with evidence. (Elinor and her friends observe and discuss the changes they see in Spotty and the other tadpoles. SEP8 . Obtaining, evaluating and communicating information a. Obtain information through discussing prior knowledge and observations with experts including teachers or knowledgeable adults f. Share findings and explanations (correct or incorrect) through a variety of methods (Elinor and her friends share their findings with Mr. Rabbit by using drawings, and they discuss what they have discovered with him). FIRST DRAFT: April 28, 2020 THE END Elinor Mr. Rabbit Ranger Rabbit Olive Ari Art Arr Olive/ari (V.O.) (O.S.) (O.C.) (CONT'D) (SUBTITLE) INT EXT I/E ELINOR WONDERS WHY CHECK NOTES ELINOR'S HOUSE -- DAY PARK – DAY FISHPOND (BRIDGE) – DAY PATH ON THE WAY HOME – DAY SCHOOL YARD – DAY RAINFALL TRANSITION PARK – A FEW DAYS LATER FISHPOND -- DAY MORE RAIN TRANSITION PARK – A FEW MORE DAYS LATER PARK BANCH – DAY FISHPOND – DAY ELINOR'S ROOM -- DAY ? KITCHEN -- DAY PATH TO SCHOOL PATH ON THE WAY TO – DAY SCHOOLYARD CLASSROOM – DAY DAY NIGHT AFTERNOON MORNING EVENING LATER MOMENTS LATER CONTINUOUS THE NEXT DAY CUT TO: FADE IN: FADE OUT. FADE TO: DISSOLVE TO: BACK TO: MATCH CUT TO: JUMP CUT TO: FADE TO BLACK.