"Overall really great and cute and charming. Awesome visual moments that are well described and written. Just some detail notes below. Thanks! Also, we're wondering if we should run this by a firefly expert. Can you send us a note on how you see the science supporting what the kids observe?" Ext. Elinor’s backyard - campsite - dusk Line Count - 104 Elinor P - 32 Olive P - 20 Ari P - 26 Ranger Rabbit P -10 Mr. Rabbit A - 5 a very cute first draft. this will be a visually beautiful epsiode as well. Very, very cute. We can't wait to see this one! ELINOR and her friends are camping out in the backyard tonight! FOUR PUP TENTS are set up in a circle, one for each of the kids and one for the parents. MR. RABBIT sits on a STUMP as the kids finish setting up their tents. While the girls’ tents are mostly up, Ari’s tent only has the FRONT POLE in place while the back is collapsed. Elinor looks proudly at her tent as Olive steps out of hers. Is it odd that Mr.R is just sitting on a stump watching as Ari struggles with his tent? Can we not give him something to do - ie. even just finishing up his tent and then steps inside for a moment (through back door) Can you note that they are all in their Pajamas - parents included i would think Elinor There! My tent is all set up. Olive Mine too! Easy peasy . She plucks a SUPPORTING LINE and it lets out a sharp <TWANG>! Great physical comedy. Ari (o.s.) Wait... this can’t be right... The girls look over to see an Ari sized lump trying to figure out where his second tent pole goes. The pole keeps poking out in different directions. ARI (CONT’D) Hmm, does this go here... or here? Or maybe here? He pokes his head out and sees everyone else’s tents. Ari (CONT’D) Huh? Your tents are already set up? How’d you do that so fast? He crawls out and looks between their tents and his. Ari (CONT’D) What am I doing wrong? ELINOR (Giggles) Do you want some help? Ari I think I’ve almost got it. His tent collapses entirely. Ari shrugs. Ari (CONT’D) Ok , maybe I need help. Ari hops back inside as Olive moves to the back of his tent. The girls each grab one end of the pup tent and pull it into shape. Inside, Ari sets up the poles as the girls secure the fastening lines to the ground. Ari hops out and admires it. Could we drop the "See?" from Ari's line? It makes it sound like he's telling the girls how easy it was to put up the tent, when in reality, he couldn't have done it without them. An alternative might be, "Like you said, Olive! Easy peasy." ARI (CONT’D) There, perfect! (dusting his hands) See? Easy peasy . The kids <LAUGH> and climb into their tents and sit cross legged in the openings. 11-14 Very nice. Olive I’ve been looking forward to camping all week! Sleeping outside in a tent is the best . Consider having Elinor say here, "My favorite part of camping is being outside in Nature!" (Seems more her character, and it's not clear that she was going to say hot chocolate). I agree with Jorge and Daniel about the characters ..I would think that Ari would love the hot chocolate and marshmellows and Elinor would like exploring and Olve would like telling stories. Elinor My favorite part of camping is- Then change this line to, "Ok, how wants hot chocolate and marshmallows?" Ranger rabbit (O.S.) Hot chocolate and marshmallows! RANGER RABBIT approaches carrying a TRAY OF HOT CHOCOLATE for everyone. The kids <CHEER> as Ranger Rabbit gives them each a MUG. Elinor takes a sip of her chocolate. If you change as suggested above, change this line to, "Thanks Mom. Mmmm... hot chocolate is also my favorite part of camping." and having the kids giggle in response. ELINOR Would Olive poke her trunk into the mug, or would she be more likely to hold the mug with her trunk? MIght be a moot point if you give this line to Ari. Thanks Mom. (Slurp) Mmmm ... hot chocolate’s the best part for sure . Olive <SLURPS> from her mug and smacks her lips. She sticks her trunk into her mug and comes out with a MARSHMALLOW. She tosses it into the air and catches it her mouth <CHOMP>! Consider a cross-fade here while they drink cocoa to get us into night. Alternately, maybe it's been slowly getting dark and Ari notices and says something like, "Ooh, it's getting dark. My favorite part of camping is..." (Just something to motivate why Mr. Rabbit would be wanting to go to sleep. It might feel a little weird that he wants to turn in while it's still light out). Olive I like the marshmallows. Everyone <LAUGHS>. Ari My favorite part of camping is staying up late and telling stories. Mr. Rabbit takes a final <SIP> of his hot chocolate and lets out a big <YAWN>! Mr. RABBIT Fine by me as long as your stories are quiet. Marshmallows make me (yawn) sleepy, and I’m going to bed... G’night everyone. Elinor Night-night, Dad. Mr. Rabbit walks to Elinor and kisses her head before doing the same to Ranger Rabbit and crawling into their tent. <LOUD SNORING> is heard from within instantly. 19-22 Nice job setting up importance of quiet. elinor (covering her ears) (CONT’D) haha! great scene Wow... marshmallows really do make him tired! Everyone <LAUGHS> loudly. Mr. Rabbit wakes up and pops his sleepy head out of the tent. Mr. RABBIT Waaa ? Wassup ? RaNGER RABBIT It’s nothing dear, go back to sleep. Dad pokes his head back into the tent. Sweet moment RANGER RABBIT (CONT’D) (whispers to the kids) I dont think she needs to comment that he's trying to sleep as its been made clear - maybe ' now, if you're going to talk, you'd better do it quielty' Dad’s trying to sleep. If you’re going to talk, you’d better do it quietly. Dad starts <SNORING> again. The kids and Ranger Rabbit stifle <GIGGLES>. Ranger Rabbit makes a friendly ZIP GESTURE across her lips. Elinor and her friends do the same, smiling. Elinor turns on her FLASHLIGHT and shines it on Ari in the tent next to her. Elinor (stage whisper) Psst . Ari, can you hear me? Ari strains to listen, but he can’t hear anything. He turns on his flashlight and points at his ears and shrugs. ari (stage whisper) What’re you saying? Olive hears whispering, but can’t make it out. She picks up her flashlight and shines it between Elinor and Ari. olive (stage whisper) Huh? Are you two telling stories? Back on Elinor, straining to hear her friends. Elinor (to hERSELF) I can’t hear anything! Elinor climbs out of her tent and walks quietly to her mom. This should be "farther away" and not "further away" Elinor (stage whisper) (CONT’D) Is it okay if we play further away so we don’t wake Dad? Ranger RABBIT (stage whisper) Sure, just don’t leave the yard. Elinor walks over to Ari and gestures for him to follow. Elinor (stAGE WHISPER) Pssst Ari... follow me! Ari climbs out of his tent with his flashlight and the two sneak over to Olive’s tent. Elinor (stage whisper) (CONT’D) Come on, Olive... but remember we have to be quiet. Cute. Like that you switched it to Olive. :) OLIVE (stage whisper) perhaps a gag opportinity - ranger rabbit watched the kids and smiles - then a beat - Mr.R snores really loud, startling her - a little scream and then covers her mouth quickly to keep quiet Not sure what kids will think about “quietest sneaker around” – they might think of the shoe. Maybe "I'm the quietest at sneaking around!" Are you kidding? I’m the quietest sneaker around. Just do what I do and we won’t make a peep! Olive moves away from the tents on exaggerated TIP TOES, leading with her flashlight. Elinor and Ari follow behind, copying her moves. Ranger Rabbit watches over and smiles, as Mr. Rabbit <SNORES> in the tent. Ext. ElINOR’S BACKYARD - away from tents - NOW DARK It’s now dark and the kids sneak over to the edge of the yard. They all use flashlights. Though further away, Mr. Rabbit can still be heard <SNORING>. Olive See? I bet you didn’t know elephants could be so quiet. Ari and Elinor <LAUGH>, loud enough to disturb Mr. Rabbit in his nearby tent. He stirs in his sleep. Mr. RaBBIT (talking in his sleep) <Snore> More marshmallows? Why yes please... <Snore> The kids look at Mr. Rabbit’s tent as they cover their hands with their mouths. They look back at each other and relax. Ari (to elinor) Marshmallows make your Dad tired and give him marshmallow dreams? Cool! Elinor We have to try not to wake him. (she wonders) How can we talk to each other without making noise? Olive looks up at the darkened sky. Consider adding to this line, "It's too dark to write notes, or to give each other hand signals." olive (wondering) It’s too dark to write notes... As the kids wonder, a BLINKING FIREFLY passes them in the background. Elinor looks up just after it passes. Nice curiosity moment. Elinor Huh? What was that? Olive I saw something too! Ari (pointing) It went over there. The kids look where Ari is pointing and see the firefly hovering at the edge of the yard. elinor Oh! Do you see that? What’s that flashing light? Note for Sara: is "high enough to be a star?" ok? olive maybe.."it's not way up in the sky, like those stars" Is it a star? No, it can’t be... it’s not high enough to be a star. ari Maybe it’s a forest fairy! Gasp! They grant wishes, right? Nice Olive (Giggling) It’s not a fairy, fairies aren’t real... (doubting herself) Are they? Ari and Olive shine their lights at the firefly, drowning the blinking light. Olive (CONT’D) Huh? Where’d it go? Ari It was here just a second ago. Elinor Try turning off your flashlights. Ari, Olive and Elinor all turn off their flashlights and the firefly reappears. OlivE There it is again! It's not clear how she knows it's a firefly. Consider adding a bit where she somehow sees something that clues her in, like maybe she gets curious and turns on and off her flashlight and she tracks a little bug flying the same path. Or maybe more simply, she gets a glimpse of the bug when her flash light is on. Or maybe neither and just adjust her line. In either case, change her line to something like, "Wait, it's not a fairy or a star... I think it's a firefly. Let's take a closer look!" or something like that. Elinor if elinor knew what it was, why didnt she say something sooner? - maybe more like she's just piecing it together -'oh, wait a minute....' agree with everyone else...Maybe they should maybe take a closer look..maybe discover it's like a fly/ bug and then come to the name when Ranger Rabbit intros around line 57 Agree with everyone's notes here It’s not a fairy or a star... It’s a firefly! Let’s get a closer look. This line is fine because it does not interfere with learning but it will definitely need visuals to support the words for preschool understanding. Olive We don't think this is a particularly kid-like phrase and would prefer to find something that's a bit more authentic to the audience Ooo ! I get to flex my tip toe muscles again... C’mon ! Olive leads the kids closer on exaggerated tip toes. Ext. elINOR’S BACKYARD - EDGE OF YARD - contINUOUS The kids approach the edge of the yard. The firefly blinks as it hovers just past the tree line of the forest. OK by us Elinor I’ve never been so close to a firefly before! I'd remove "I'm confused" ...the rest could just be asked like a question Ari I’m confused... that blinking light is a bug ? He leans in and squints at the firefly. Ari (CONT’D) Are you sure it’s not a fairy? Elinor (Giggles) It’s definitely not a fairy, Ari! Olive Wait... if it’s a bug, then... where does the light come from? Elinor Good question... maybe it’s carrying a light? Cute Olive Like a little lantern? Torch might be too adult. Try "teeny candle"? Ari Or a teeny torch? Ranger Rabbit approaches the kids. "Consider smoothing Ranger Rabbit's entrance here. She can come in, asking, ""What are you kids looking at?"" And Elinor (or someone) responds, ""Mom, we found a firefly."" then Olive ""We're wondering how it makes light. Is it carrying something that lights up?"" or something like that. Maybe make Mom's response here a little clearer. The point is that the light is part of the firefly's body. Maybe ""isn't carrying anything that makes light... it's body is what makes the light!"" or something like that." RaNGER RABBIT That firefly isn’t carrying any kind of light at all... She approaches the firefly softly and holds out a finger. They firefly flutters over and lands on it. She brings the bug over to the kids who lean in for a closer look. SCIENCE MOMENT CU: The kids get a good look at the firefly. The kids are astounded as the bug’s abdomen flickers. Typo in preceding description ("they firefly"). Ranger rabbit (CONT’D) The firefly is a light! Look... The firefly’s abdomen pulses a few times. Olive Woah ! How does it do that? Could we adjust this wording? Maybe “…they can glow brightly or dimly.” Ranger rabbit Firefly bodies are very special... they can make them glow brighter or dimmer. Elinor That’s sooo interesting! Ari Cool! Can I do that? Ari tries to flex different parts of his body. First his hands, then his elbows. Nothing. Ari (CONT’D) (Flexing) Nope... nothing there... He turns around and flexes his rear. Funny moment here, nice. Ari (CONT’D) (Flexing efforts) How about now? Everyone <GIGGLES> softly. Ranger RABBIT Sorry Ari, not many animals can make their bodies glow... Ari flexes a bicep . Ranger rabbit (CONT’D) ...And bats aren’t one of them. Ari stops mid-flex and looks over. ARI Aw , too bad. Elinor leans back into the firefly for another look. It blinks on and off. Elinor I wonder why it’s blinking like that... Suddenly, the firefly takes off and flies into the forest. Elinor (excitedly, loudly) (CONT’D) We need more observations! Mr. Rabbit (Talking in his sleep) Like how you've been weaving Mr. Rabbit and Olive's sneaking into the story. (Snore) That’s the biggest marshmallow I’ve ever seen. (Snore) Elinor catches herself! Elinor (stage whisper) Oops. We need more observations! (then) Mom, can we follow the firefly? RaNGER RABBIT Sure! I’ll come too. can they slowly sneak into the forest - all following olives action - instead of crawling on all 4's - they are all holding flashlights so it'll be akward for them. it also saves on carwling cycles for all 4 characters Olive I'm not sure 'sneaky' is the best adverb for this...maybe stay with the quiet theme. Let’s be extra sneaky so we don’t scare it. Follow me! Olive drops onto all fours and sneaks after the firefly into the forest, followed by Ari and Elinor. Ranger Rabbit shrugs and drops to all fours to follow the kids. Ext. Grassy area - continuous ANGLE ON: The forest opens into a clearing. The firefly flies out of the forest and past camera. One by one, Elinor, Olive Ari, and Ranger Rabbit pop up from behind bushes and look past camera. Their eyes go wide with amazement. REVEAL: The firefly has led them to a grassy clearing filled with fireflies. Countless flickering lights hover just above the grass, filling the darkened night with a beautiful glow. The kids step out into the clearing. in this seq - do they still have flashlights on? They are in their pajamas and dont have pockets or anywhere to put them. Pls clarify when they should have them off or on Elinor Woah .... There are so many of them! Reveal Olive is trying her best to count them. maybe she can't count because they keep turning on and off...this would support the learning more. olive 7...8... wait did I count that one already? 9...10... oh, stop moving! (she gives up) We like Sara's suggestion! It’s impossible to count! Consider specifying a beat for the curiosity moment here. After "And they're all blinking" give them a beat to appreciate the beauty, and then Elinor has a thought: "But I wonder... why do they do that? Why do fireflies glow like that?" or something like that. Elinor It’s so beautiful. And they’re all blinking... but why? OLIVE Agree with Kevin, try something else? seems more like an adult reference - try something like 'lost their favourite toy...' <-- agree Maybe they lost their keys and they need the light to find them? The fireflies appear and disappear as they flash and blink above the grass. Two OBVIOUS FIREFLIES approach Elinor and swirl around her, blinking. She twirls and <GIGGLES>. here she can hold out one hand and have them both land on it as she is holding the flashlight with the other Ari Wow! They sure like you, Elinor. She puts out her hands and a firefly lands on each one. Elinor raises them to get a closer look. The fireflies start to flash in unison, following a simple pattern. Elinor Woah ! Look at this, they’re flashing at the same time. Olive and Ari approach for a closer look. The fireflies continue to flash in unison. Ari Gasp! I think it’s a pattern... they keep flashing the same way over and over again. They kids watch as the bugs repeat the same pattern a few times. The friends start to count along. instead of one two maybe you show the pattern by saying on off Elinor / ari / olive It’s a bit hard to tell what the pattern is – we like Sara’s suggestion to say on/off to demonstrate the pattern, although it's probably hard to demonstrate a quick "one-two" by saying "on-off". Maybe just blink, blink, blink-blink? The one two is a little confusing since we aren’t really counting anything. One.. two .. one-two . One.. two .. one-two . One.. two .. one-two . olive You’re right, Ari! It is a pattern. One.. two .. one-two . As the pair of fireflies continue to flash in unison, several more approach and hover nearby. just so i'm clear visually - are the other ones flashing at all? if so, do they start to mimic the pattern? Olive (CONT’D) Look... the blinking pattern is attracting more fireflies. Sure enough, more fireflies approach, forming a SMALL GROUP. The two obvious fireflies take off from Elinor’s hands and hover above her head. They continue to pulse in unison as they fly away from the kids. The small group of fireflies follows them as they fly out over the grass and swirl around. Elinor considers as she watches the action. Elinor Look at that... they’re following the blinking fireflies everywhere. "It's almost as if..." feels too grown up. Try something more kid like. Maybe "It's like they are saying..." or "It's like they're blinking to tell each other..." Ari It’s almost as if by blinking like that, they’re saying- He starts jumping up and down and waving his arms around. Ari (CONT’D) Hey! Look at me! I’m over here! Follow me! Elinor realizes something. Phrase this more like a hypothesis, e.g. "Ari! That's it! Maybe they are talking when they blink." ElINOR Ari! That must be it... they’re talking when they blink. Olive Oh I see! Instead of using words, they use patterns of blinking light. Ari holds up his hands with closed fists. He opens and closes them to mimic “blinking”. again here - ari will use one hand to demonstrate as he's holding the flashlight with the other Ari Oh! So you’re telling me “one.. two .. one two. One.. two .. one two” does mean... (jumping around) “Look at me! Look at me!”?? Olive and Elinor <GIGGLE>. OLIVE Yeah! I think so. Ari puffs up his chest. Agree with Kevin on his note for this line. Elinor's line here could be something like, "Mom, is that true? Do fireflies flash their lights to talk to each other?" ARI after 92 - Ranger Rabbit was with them in the bushes at the top of the seq. and the kids only stepped into the clearing - they wouldnt have gone far and Ranger Rabbit would have stuck close by. therefore she would have been close enough to hear their discovery. suggest tweaking so elinor isnt repeating what they just figured out, but instead maybe ask if theyre correct. line 93 - she can explain I didn’t know I could speak firefly! Ranger Rabbit approaches. Elinor Mom! Mom! Look... Those fireflies are blinking in a pattern. We think they’re talking to the other fireflies. Ranger Rabbit watches with Elinor as the small group of fireflies continues to chase the two obvious fireflies flashing in unison. RangER RABBIT That’s exactly what they’re doing! Because fireflies are awake at night, they need to be able to talk to each other in the dark. Blinking lights is a perfect way to do it! Elinor Hmmm ... I never thought of that... Ranger rabbit It isn’t only fireflies that use light to talk in the dark... A THOUGHT BUBBLE appears. A LIGHTHOUSE sits on a cliff over an OCEAN. It shines a light out over the water and an approaching SHIP changes course away from the cliff. Add a reaction to Mom's line 97. Maybe Ari says, "Whoa..." and Elinor says, "Hmmm..." as she forms her idea. Ranger rabbit (CONT’D) At night, we use lighthouses to talk with ships at sea. By shining a light out into the ocean, we’re saying “Watch out for the cliff!” visual idea - and most likely something ari would do since its silly and he was trying to make his body glow earlier. perhaps during the song Ari put his flashlight under his shirt so it looks like abdomin is glowing OR if you feel theres a place earlier for this action as he finally figures out a way to look like a firefly Elinor (realizing) Wait a minute - that’s how we can talk without waking Dad! We can use our flashlights! She holds up her flashlight and blinks it. MUSIC starts playing as the kids dance around with their flashlights and the fireflies. "Fourth verse: the Mars reference might seem to come from left field (we're talking about lights and stars in this episode, not planets). Consider a different joke here. Last Chorus: The last line can be shorter, consider ""When we blink like fireflies!"" Maybe add giggles each time the kids flash messages to each other after the song ends. " Elinor / olive / ari (singing) last seq - will it be understood that they laugh because of moms participation? still may be cute even if the audience doesnt get that point - but see it that they're giggling because they're all having fun . Do you see that blinking light, Flying through the darkest night? Are you saying ‘hi’ or ‘bye’? When you’re blinking firefly? The kids and Ranger Rabbit leave the clearing. Unseen by them, a group of fireflies follow. Ext. Forest trail - conTINUOUS The kids and Ranger Rabbit walk back down the trail. ELINOR - When we want to talk at night OLIVE - But we can’t, we’ll use our lights ARI - We’ll do like the firefly ALL - And use lights that shine so bright. Ext. ElinoR’S BACKYARD - edge of yard - conTINUOUS The kids exit the forest into the yard. They blink the patterns with their lights as they sing. ELINOR - One blink means: “How are you?” OLIVE - Two blinks mean: “Great, and you?” ELINOR - Three blinks mean: “Let’s look at the stars?” ARI - Four blinks mean: “Are there snacks on Mars!” ALL: Do you see that blinking light, Flashing in the darkest night? It’s us, saying ‘hi’ or ‘bye’? When we’re blinking like a firefly! The kids sneak back over to the campsite. After a beat, the group of fireflies exits the forest into the yard. Ext. ELINOR’S BACKYARD - campsite - conTINUOUS Everyone sneaks back into the campsite as the music ends. Mr. Rabbit is still <SNORING> in his tent. The kids and Ranger Rabbit lie down in their tents, heads poking out. Elinor uses her flashlight to blink a pattern to her friends. Ari responds to Elinor with a few blinks, then turns to Olive and blinks a pattern to her. Olive responds with a third pattern. Ranger Rabbit joins and blinks a pattern to the kids. The kids are surprised by Mom’s unexpected participation and <LAUGH> too loudly, stirring Mr. Rabbit. No more notes after this line. Nice work. Mr. RabbIT (Snore) So many marshmallows... (Snore) The kids and Ranger Rabbit silently stifle <GIGGLES> as they continue to blink patterns back and forth in the dark. All around them, fireflies blink in the night sky.

EWW132 "Light the Way" D1 .

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ELINOR WONDERS WHY EP 132 "Light the Way" By Tom Berger Elinor’s Question: How can we talk to each other in the dark without making noise? Logline: Elinor and her friends are having a camping sleepover in the backyard, but when they get too loud they need to find a new way to communicate so they don’t keep Dad awake. Curriculum Goals: SEP6: Look for and describe patterns and relationships in natural phenomena. SEP8: Describe observable phenomena using adjectives and labels. LS2 : Understand that animals have different body parts that are used in different ways to meet their needs. (Elinor and her friends observe the flashing abdomens of the fireflies) ND2: Begin to understand that systems developed in our world often work in similar ways to systems found in the natural world. (After being inspired by the fireflies, Elinor and her friends decide to communicate with their flashlights). Line Count: 104 Main Characters: Elinor, Olive, Ari, Ranger Rabbit Secondary Characters: Mr. Rabbit Props: Pup tents, Stump, Tent Poles, Supporting Lines, Tray, Mugs, Marshmallows, Flashlights, Thought Bubble (lighthouse on cliff with ship at sea), Fireflies Locations: Elinor's Backyard, Forest, Clearing First Draft: 22-MAY-19 Olive Ari Elinor Ranger rabbit Olive / ari Mr. rabbit Ari\ Elinor / ari / hazel Elinor / olive / ari Elinor’s Dad (V.O.) (O.S.) (O.C.) (CONT'D) (SUBTITLE) (to herself) (stage whisper) (proud) (Talking in his sleep) (sotto) (singing) INT EXT I/E ELINOR'S BACKYARD ELINOR'S BACKYARD - EDGE OF YARD GRASSY AREA FOREST TRAIL ELINOR'S BACKYARD - CAMPSITE DAY NIGHT AFTERNOON MORNING EVENING LATER MOMENTS LATER CONTINUOUS THE NEXT DAY DUSK CUT TO: FADE IN: FADE OUT. FADE TO: DISSOLVE TO: BACK TO: MATCH CUT TO: JUMP CUT TO: FADE TO BLACK.